Finding the Right Counsellor for you needs
There’s no shame in admitting that you need help. Sometimes issues come up and neither you nor your spouse can figure out how to resolve these problems. Being able to admit that there’s a problem is the first step to fixing it. The next step is to get help and this is where counselling comes in. It can be difficult to open up about deeply personal issues with someone who’s essentially a stranger to you, but these people are trained professionals and they understand exactly how to help you.
Meet The Therapist
How to find a counsellor that’s right for you is very important. While all therapists and counsellors undergo training and certification, they’re still people at the end of the day. This means that they will handle different problems using different solutions.
Can Counselling Help?
There are a lot of different opinions regarding counselling. There are many who claim that it served to exacerbate the problems while others claim that they would have crumbled without it. At the end of the day, counselling is only helpful when the therapist and client are all working together to resolve issues. I
Find Someone Trained to Help
There are several factors to keep in mind before committing to a therapist. Among the various points that you need to consider, one of them would be the training the counsellor has received. Counselling isn’t the same as individual counselling because the needs and structure of the therapy sessions are very different from each other. A counsellor on the individual level will provide you with the guidance to process your emotions and will let you take the reins mostly.
There are many counsellors out there who say that they provide counselling for couples because they believe that there’s nothing unique or different about therapy. This is an incorrect assumption on their part. When researching therapists, it would be a good idea to ask questions about their qualifications in couples counselling, such as if they have any credentials in models designed by the Gottman Institute for example.
Another helpful tip to determine whether a potential counsellor is capable of helping you, would be to ask about how often they see couple clients during the day.
The Approach of the Therapist
Figuring out how to find the right counsellor for you is also dependent on factors other than how well versed they are with couple’s therapy. The methods that a counsellor employs to help you are also crucial to the success of your sessions.
The first and foremost thing to keep in mind is that your counsellor’s only priority should be to help you resolve your problems with your spouse. Harmony is the end goal here. Your counsellor should not replace solutions with their opinions. In the context of the sessions they need to be as neutral as possible. So if your therapist begins suggesting divorce or starts saying that your problems can’t be resolved, then you need a new therapist.
Also of note is that some therapists might suggest a single strategy for helping your marriage. This is also an extremely unhelpful approach because people (and couples) are all distinct from one another and a standard approach will not be successful in every case. Any therapist that insists your marriage will not succeed if it follows a ‘cookie-cutter’ pattern, is not adequately qualified to help you resolve your problems.
And remember, marriage counsellors are people and not all-knowing entities. They aren’t privy to any secret information that tells them when a couple needs to give up. Many who attend marital therapy don’t seem to realise this fact and take it to heart when the counsellor talks about incompatibility. In truth, that’s merely an opinion and not a fact. It must not be treated as an objective assessment on the state of your marriage.
It can be overwhelming and scary to admit you need help and it can certainly feel stressful when you have to figure out how to find a counsellor that’s right for you. But as long as you ask the right questions and focus on repairing your marriage you will be able to get the best out of the experience.
2 Locations in Calgary Alberta
Living Well Counselling Services Inc.
4803 Centre Street Northwest #4,
Calgary, AB T2E 2Z6
39-35 Inglewood Park SE,
Calgary, AB T2G 1B5
Living Well was created with certain values in mind. We want to help you connect with a Psychologist or Counsellor that is effective in their areas of strength and also one that is welcoming, non-judgemental & easy to work with. Whether you need to meet with a counsellor for anxiety, addictions or depression, are in need of couples therapy, anger management tools or an LGBTQ friendly therapist, one of us may be a good fit. For tips on finding the right counsellor, click here. We also strive to keep our rates lower than the set rate for most Calgary counselling agencies, and have therapists covered by benefits should you have access to extended health coverage.
Although Living Well is a counselling Calgary practice, we now serve clients worldwide through the advances of technology. We also offer a free 20-minute initial